


Conversations With Nebula

by Northern_Lady



Series: Infinity Dialogues [1]
Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Dialogue Heavy, Fluff, Longing, Nightmares, No Smut, Post-Movie: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, Post-Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Romance, Sadness, Short One Shot, jarnbjorn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-14
Updated: 2018-01-14
Packaged: 2019-03-04 22:48:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13374702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Northern_Lady/pseuds/Northern_Lady
Summary: As the title says, Conversations with Nebula.





	Conversations With Nebula

For months Gamora had been thinking about her sister. She didn’t think about her constantly but from time to time she wondered where Nebula was and if she were safe and if she had found peace somehow. Sometimes she even dreamed about her.  
A loud beeping woke Gamora from one of her dreams about her sister. “What is that?” she said still sleepy.  
“I think it’s a distress signal,” Peter said, dragging himself out of bed next to her. “I’m gonna go see.”  
Gamora got up to follow him out to the bridge. If someone needed help, she wanted to be there to help too. It didn’t take checking the ship’s computers to find out the truth. They could see from the bridge window that there was another ship in the distance. It was badly damaged. Peter piloted their ship over to the damaged one and before long the smaller ship had docked with theirs. Their scans showed only one life sign aboard.  
The pod bay doors opened and a blue skinned woman stepped out. “Nebula!” Gamora exclaimed. She went to her sister and hugged her. This time Nebula stiffly hugged her in return. “What happened to you? To your ship?” she said stepping away from her.  
“I stole a weapon I thought was capable against Thanos. The former owner tried to steal it back. My ship was badly damaged before I made a jump away. My engines failed and I ended up here.” Nebula explained.  
“Well, since you don’t have a working ship, you’re welcome to stay on this one,” Gamora offered. “For as long as you want.”  
Nebula glanced at her sister then at Peter who nodded his agreement. “Perhaps I will stay for now,” she finally said.  
***********************  
Gamora got up early the next morning while Peter was still asleep and wandered into the tiny kitchen area of the ship. Nebula was already there drinking a cup of tea.  
“How long have you been sleeping in his bed?” Nebula asked without so much as saying good morning.  
“Long enough. Why?” was Gamora’s defensive reply.  
“No reason.” Nebula looked down into her cup of tea.  
Gamora took her own cup down from the shelf and made a cup of tea. She sat down at the small table across from Nebula. Maybe Nebula had only been curious Gamora decided. “It has been three months.”  
“There months with the same man…” Nebula mused. “Is he good to you?”  
Somehow the question made Gamora sad. “He is good to me.”  
Nebula nodded, struggling to blink back the tears in her eyes. “Good.”  
Gamora reached across the table and took her sister’s hand. “Have you never had a man who was good to you?” She knew very little of Nebula’s romantic life. While they had both served Thanos, Gamora had a few lovers among her father’s men. She was Thanos favorite daughter, None of them would have dared to hurt her. Nebula hadn’t been so lucky. She was not the favorite daughter and she had cybernetic enhancements which might have made men pay her less attention. The realization that her sister might not have ever known any affection at all cut her more deeply than she had expected.  
“Yes. One man. He was good to me but he was not a good man. I knew what he was and I had him anyway because I thought he was what I needed.”  
“Ronan?” Gamora hardly dared to ask. “You were with Ronan?”  
“Don’t look at me like that,” Nebula said. “Just because I don’t have your beauty doesn’t mean…”  
“It’s not that,” Gamora spoke up. “It’s simply that Ronan was Kree and he cared too much about bloodlines and purity. Why would he take a woman of another race?”  
“Once I told him that Thanos removed my ovaries then genetics were no longer a factor.”  
That made sense Gamora supposed. “And was he what you needed?”  
“Yes,” Nebula whispered. “He was not my first lover but the others treated me like an object, a thing. I only slept with a few of father’s men and ended up hating feeling so used that it wasn’t worth it. Usually when men seemed interested after that I’d just make it clear that I was off limits. But with Ronan...remember when I lost to you on Karo?”  
“I remember,” Gamora waited for Nebula to continue.  
“That was when father gave me my new eye. I was supposed to be on a ship with Ronan that afternoon for some mission or other. When I didn’t show up at the ship he came to find me. He was angry at first. Someone had told him that I was in the medical bay but failed to mention I was not a visitor but a patient. I heard him shouting at one of the nurses who told him that I was indeed in the medical bay and to please calm down. He broke one of the doors off the hinges as he came into the room to find me. He stopped short seeing that I was a patient. My face was a mess. My eye had just been torn out. There was swelling, blood. He approached my bedside and actually looked concerned. He asked me who had done this and I told him it was Thanos. And then he reached out and touched my cheek and told me that someday we would find a way to make sure that Thanos could never hurt me again. No one had ever said anything like that to me before. No one had ever implied that they even cared what Thanos was doing to me let alone imply that they would try and stop him. No man had ever touched me gently like that either. So when he invited me to his bed later I needed very little convincing. It did not occur to me until after he died that perhaps Ronan was manipulating me all along. Perhaps that moment in the medical bay was when he realized he didn’t want Thanos as an ally. Perhaps he believed he needed my loyalty to get to Thanos.”  
“Is it you think Ronan so evil that he was not capable of caring for you or think yourself not worthy of being cared for?” Gamora asked her sister on hearing her story.  
“I don’t know,” Nebula said. “He was evil, wasn’t he?”  
“Even evil men are capable of caring for a few people in their own way,” Gamora found herself saying. She had to say something. She couldn’t stand the thought of tainting Nebula’s only memories of affection.  
“Maybe,” Nebula said reluctantly as a single tear rolled down her cheek.  
“Did you miss him?”  
“No. What I miss are those few nights after Ronan had the infinity stone. For three nights Ronan was more powerful than Thanos. For three nights I slept in the one place that Thanos could not hurt me, in the arms of a man who was kind to me.”  
“You will find another man who is kind to you. One who is not evil.” Gamora said sadly.  
Nebula gave her sister a look. “No one would want me now. I’ve had more implants since Ronan and the few men I knew before him made no secret of how unnatural and unattractive I was. I don’t need to find another man. All I want is to kill Thanos and then I can die in peace.”  
“I’d rather you didn’t die too soon,” Gamora said. “We’ve spent so much time fighting and so little time getting to know each other.”  
“Don’t worry. It’s going to take a long while to kill Thanos. We’ll have time.”  
***************************  
Three nights later Peter visited the bridge of the ship in the middle of the night. He’d had another of those dreams about his mother’s death and couldn’t seem to get back to sleep. He’d just settled into the captain’s chair when he heard her approaching.  
“Can’t sleep?” Peter asked Nebula as she took a nearby chair.  
“Can you?” she said in reply.  
“No. I have nightmares sometimes about my mom dying. You?”  
She nodded. “I have nightmares as well.”  
“About Thanos? Gamora told me what he did to you,” Peter said.  
“Gamora doesn’t even know the half of what he did to me. But yes, my dreams are of Thanos.”  
“So, the weapon you stole before we found your ship, will that kill him?”  
“It is said that this weapon can kill a Celestial. If I can reach Thanos before he finds the rest of the infinity stones then perhaps I will have a chance.” Nebula told him.  
“What is it? A big ass gun, or what?”  
She shook her head. “It is an axe called Jarnbjorn. It once belonged to an Asgardian. They are a powerful people. Primitive worlds once worshipped them as gods. If any weapon can kill Thanos, this one can. It can at least damage him.”  
“Well, why not find some of these Asgardians to help you if they are so powerful and all?”  
“I tried. When I reached their world I found it destroyed, gone. It doesn’t matter. I have the axe. It will have to be enough.” Nebula said.  
Peter fell silent for a long while after that. Nebula occupied herself staring out at the stars.  
“Do you love my sister?” Nebula spoke up after a while.  
“Yeah. Yeah, I do,” Peter replied to her unexpected question.  
“Good,” Nebula said and she left the chair at his side and fled the bridge.  
*****************************************  
When they met the Asgardian ship in space, Nebula was surprised the see that so many Asgardians had survived such destruction. They spoke to the Captain of the ship, apparently a King called Thor, on the viewscreen and learned that the people had fled just before their world was destroyed. Then Peter invited their leader on board.  
The bay doors opened and a blond man with a red cloak stepped aboard followed by a darker haired and dressed in green and black. Nebula recognized the second man. “Loki?”  
“Nebula?” Loki replied, confused.  
Thor looked back and forth from Nebula to Loki and then at the rest of the crew who was equally confused. “Who the hell are you guys? Loki, how do you know these people?”  
“I only know her,” Loki nodded to Nebula. “The others are strangers to me.”  
“How do you know him?” Gamora immediately asked.  
“He was an ally of Thanos. He was on Ronan’s ship for a few weeks and then took another ship with the Other on some mission for our father.” Nebula explained.  
Gamora’s stance tensed. “If you people are allies of Thanos you are not welcome here.”  
“We’re not,” Loki said, his hands raised as if in surender. “I never wanted to be an ally of Thanos. I simply accepted that I could not beat him.”  
Thor stared at Loki in sadness. “I have long waited for you to tell me the name of whoever it was that made you act so recklessly. Thanos…now that I know his name, I can seek to defeat him.”  
*********************************  
The Guardians kept their ship docked with the Asgardian ship. They were invited on board the larger ship as friends and allies. Once Peter learned that they were going to earth, he wanted to go with them and it was decided that the two ships would make the journey together.  
As usual, Nebula did not sleep well. She wandered the long corridors of the Asgardian ship by night, just as an escape from the nightmares. She rounded a corner and found two young lovers in an alcove kissing and giggling. Neither of them had anything but happiness in their minds. Nebula hadn’t meant to stay and watch the scene. She hadn’t meant to start crying. She felt the wetness on her face and realized she was being stupid. She turned and fled. She didn’t get far. She ran around the corner and stumbled directly into a man. She took a step back to see who it was and saw armor, red cloak, blue eyes, blond hair…  
“Perhaps you’d best be careful of running in dark corridors,” Thor said to her, with a small smile. “What monsters were you fleeing?”  
“It was nothing, I just…”  
A noise around the corner alerted Thor and he moved to see what the monster might have actually been. Nebula thought about running off while he checked on the noise. She was only going to look stupid when he discovered she was running from two lovers. He was a king though, and she knew from experience that it was dangerous to be rude to kings, so she stayed where she was.  
Thor came back moments later. He had no doubt seen the young lovers and now he saw the tears on her face. “You have lost someone?” he said, understanding at least partially what had made her run.  
“I suppose I have, or maybe there was never anyone to be found.”  
“I can not see why not,” Thor said. “You are a beautiful woman and a capable warrior. Someone will find you.”  
Nebula took a step back. “There is nothing beautiful about all this metal and computer parts that Thanos put into me. And as for being a warrior, my sister always beat me. I am quite inferior as a fighter.”  
Thor took a step closer and put a hand on her shoulder. “Inferior is not a word I would use to describe you. I have spent plenty of time with Peter Quill and Gamora in the last few days. Both of them speak highly of you. Even Loki had good things to say about what he remembers of you. He said that you helped him twice in the time that you knew you, that you were like an angel of mercy.”  
“I don’t remember that,” Nebula had no idea what he was talking about.  
“It doesn’t matter. We will eventually destroy Thanos. I want him dead for what he did to my brother and to Midgard. Once Thanos is gone you will have peace and maybe you will be able to believe that people care for you.” Thor took his hand from her shoulder and moved away from her.  
****************************  
The knocking on the door of Nebula’s room should have woken her from sleep but she was already awake anyway. She went to the door and pushed the button to slide open the door.  
“Loki?” she said. It was only the second time she had spoken to him since their ships had met.  
“Did I wake you?” he asked.  
“No, I..I don’t sleep much anyway.”  
“Neither do I. I thought it was past time that I return this to you. .” Loki said, he passed her a small object.  
Nebula looked down at the tiny control crystal in her hand. “I had forgotten about this.”  
“I have not,” Loki said sadly. “Giving me that saved my life. Ronan meant to kill me when he discovered what I had done. I used this to open the cargo doors and take a shuttle to meet the Other.”  
“I am sorry that it didn't work. You never found what you needed in the ship’s archive.” Nebula had caught him searching the archives which were forbidden to all but Ronan and a few select soldiers. When he admitted at knifepoint that he was looking for a particular powerful weapon, a weapon that could free him of his alliance with Thanos she had let him go and had even given him a control crystal that would allow him to escape the ship.  
“I never found it but since Ronan never knew what exactly I was looking for I was able to continue my alliance with Thanos long enough to escape him in a way. I could not have done that without your crystal and your silence. For that I thank you.”  
She nodded. Once she had known he did not want to be allied with Thanos it had been an easy decision to help him.  
“What is that?” Loki said as he gazed at a weapon on her shelf across the room. He didn’t wait for her reply. He went to the shelf and took it down. “This is Jarnbjorn. Where did you find it?”  
“I continued your search even after you left. It led me to many worlds until I found this. I can not wield it as it should be.”  
“That’s because it belongs to Thor. Others can use it but he was meant to wield it. The axe was made for him.”  
“And he will use it to kill Thanos, given the chance?” Nebula asked.  
“It is not a priority for him, but he would fight Thanos should he happen to meet him.” Loki put the axe back on the shelf. “I could arrange that meeting.”  
This had Nebula’s full attention. “How? When could you arrange this meeting?”  
“I have something Thanos wants. I need only send a message for him to come and retrieve it.”  
“And when he comes your brother will fight him?” Nebula asked.  
“He won’t have a choice,” Loki said, “Thanos will bring the fight to him.”  
Nebula was confused. “Thor might not defeat Thanos. What did Thanos do to you that you would risk your brother’s life?”  
“What Thanos did to me was not as bad as what he did to you,” Loki reached out and touched the metal on Nebula’s eyebrow. “It was enough though that I’d rather die fighting him than live fearing him.”  
“If you betray him, Thanos will not let you die so easily,” Nebula reminded him. Loki had not removed his hand. His fingers ghosted the skin near the metal around her eye. She found herself leaning in to his touch. “And if I am involved and he survives, he will do do far worse to me than he ever has before.”  
“Then you will kill me, and I will kill you before that can happen.” Loki said, moving his hand to rest on her shoulder.  
She nodded, filled with emotion. Loki understood. They had to either beat Thanos or die. There was no other option. “I agree, I would rather die than go back to him, but I can heal from almost anything and you are Jotun…”  
“We can be killed...or maybe we can escape if Thanos is busy fighting Thor,” Loki pointed out.  
“That’s your real plan? To escape while your brother fights?” Nebula was irritated with him. “Then why involve me at all? Because I have the axe?”  
Loki shrugged. “I could try and take it from you.”  
“You could try,” she agreed.  
“Or I could tell Thor and he could take it from you,” Loki pointed out.  
She regarded him with questioning eyes. He was watching her with amusement. “You have no intention of doing that. Why are you trying to make me angry?”  
Loki smiled. “You are quite beautiful when you’re angry. I saw you yesterday arguing with your sister on the bridge. You were furious and lovely all at once.”  
“Flattery isn’t going to work on me,” Nebula said grabbing down the axe from the shelf. “If you want this, take it. I’ll not listen to your lies any longer.” She shoved the weapon into his hands.  
Loki looked down at the axe sadly, then up at Nebula. “I didn’t come here for this. Keep it,” He said and he passed it back to her and left her room.  
*************************************  
Three nights later Nebula awoke with another of her many nightmares. She wandered the corridors of the ship for nearly an hour before stopping on the bridge. Loki was there reading. He looked up as she approached. She went and sat in one of the nearby chairs without a word.  
“Nightmares?” he asked her.  
“Yes,” she said and left it at that.  
“I would offer to share my space with you so that you need not sleep alone but I think you might try to kill me if I did,” Loki said.  
His words surprised her. Not because he would offer such a thing. Plenty of men were willing to use an ugly woman, given the right circumstances. The part that surprised her was the pang of longing she felt at his offer. She hadn’t known until that moment how much she actually wanted affection. She hadn’t realized how much she had been just aching to sleep with someone’s arms around her and feel safe and cared for. She had been alone for so long that she had denied herself permission to even think about how much it hurt to be alone. And now that she was thinking about it she couldn’t hold back the tears.  
“Nebula?” Loki said, concerned at her sudden change in emotions.  
“I wouldn’t try to kill you,” Nebula finally made herself reply.  
“So you would prefer not to sleep alone?”  
She nodded. “Only sleep.”  
“Only sleep,” he agreed and he took her hand and led the way back to his room.  
***********************  
More than a week after Nebula had started sleeping in Loki’s room, Gamora still had not noticed the relationship. Nebula was on her way to Loki’s room late one evening when Gamora stopped her in the hall.  
“Nebula, might I ask a favor of you?”  
“What is it?”  
“My boots have come apart. I have a sparring match with lady Sif in the morning. Since we were always the same size I hoped I could borrow a pair of yours?” Gamora said.  
“You may,” Nebula said.  
“Then I will come by your room in the morning to get them,” Gamora said, ready to walk on.  
“I won’t be there in the morning,” Nebula told her quite honestly.  
Gamora raised an eyebrow, “Where will you be?”  
“With Loki,” Nebula was reluctant to tell Gamora.  
The smallest hint of a smile turned up the corners of Gamora’s mouth. “How long have you been sleeping in his bed?”  
“Long enough, why?”  
“No reason,” Gamora continued, her amusement evident.  
“It has been a week,” Nebula told her sister.  
“And he is good to you?”  
“Yes, he is good to me,” Nebula told her truthfully.  
“Then I am glad to hear it,” Gamora gave her sister a hug before saying goodnight.


End file.
